Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Caowin's Note from the Writers

Recently I’ve received word that there is some speculation about why Y. S. Rice and I haven’t been updating the blog regularly in the last few months. And I’m sure you unintellectuals are filled with questions: What’s wrong? Are you guys being chased down by the government? Has one of you fell into the coma, forcing the other one to shoulder all writing responsibilities as well as actually work a real job too?

Some of you might even be wondering, “Who’s been doing all this speculation?” And that’s a pretty self-reflexive, postmodern question. “No, seriously,” you might say, “no one reads your blog except for a few friends who know what you guys do at all times anyway because it’s on Facebook.”

So I feel like I owe you guys an explanation. You see, when a mommy cowriter and a daddy cowriter love each other very much, the daddy cowriter (in this case, yours truly) rams his opinion roughly and insensitively into the mommy cowriter’s (Y. S. Rice, of course) sense of sarcasm. At first, the mommy cowriter bleeds, but after a while, she realizes that the world is run by people just like Caowin and gives up hope. This is why they call it losing your innocence. This is how blogs are made.

Well, anyway, when writers get older, sometimes it gets harder for the daddy cowriter to get his dickishness up. Sometimes mommy is feeling too tired to actively hate Caowin, and all she wants to do is lie there and wait for Caowin to finish so she can roll over. Or sometimes she even closes her eyes and pretends she’s hating David Cameron instead.

I had a point to this. Oh yeah, what we’ve been doing.

Yeah. Well, Y. S. Rice and I have just been taking a break in our no homo co-writing relationship in order to work some things out. Just see it like that, kids. This doesn’t mean we don’t love you, and this is in no way your fault. We’ll work things out and get back into our writing schedule soon enough.

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